“Pain leads to freedom because deep suffering leads to surrender and you start letting go of those deep things that you’ve been hanging onto. When you are going through it, it’s overwhelming. On the other side of grief and pain you come out different. You come out better and enlarged. You have more freedom and more liberation. You would have never let go of those things on your own.”
Tillian Tchividjian
Reflections From My Porch Swing 
I wonder what kinds of deep things he’s referring to? I can understand the general idea, but am not sure if I understand the specifics of what one might let go of. Maybe I haven’t done that yet, but need to. Any thoughts on that, Candy?
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Patty, for me those deep things were not only what happened with my husband, but they were things that I had pushed down into a box and slammed the lid. Some of those things for me are perfectionism, trying to please everyone, doing everything and more than is expected of me. For the entire last 4 1/2 years of Bob’s life, I was doing all I knew how to do to keep Bob here with me. I became even more of a control freak than I already was. In my mind, if I did everything right, he would be healed. That became one of those deep things that I had to work on letting go and it took me 2 years to process through that.
Does this make sense to you?
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Yes, it does, Candy. Thank you!
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Spot on! What wisdom. Thanks for posting.
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